i want one of those as a pet, and i want to take it for walks so it can prance up and down the road just like that....but then i also want it to eat people
i saw this gigantic, black, fast spider in my room last night, and it got away from my wrath. i know it's in hiding, eating nutrients so it can grow bigger and kill me in my sleep.
In other news, I never found that bastard spider. I think I heard it breathing and growing under my desk earlier . . .
I killed its brother that same day, so I'm sure it's still out for me. Unless it already climbed into my ear and into my brain (to colonize, as we know all spiders aspire to do) while I was sleeping.
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